This Week on The Last Hurrah (12/1)

Kick off your week right with our newest episode!

62 – Nov Open Mic

This week on The Last Hurrah, Kevin Cole, Isabel Duarte and Robert Martin discuss Thanksgiving mishaps, online dating and the fear of getting items stuck in certain orifices.

Isabel Duarte
Robert Martin

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Then, swing by the Maryland Ensemble Theatre for…

The WebMD Show (Nov 29)

Something is always ailing the cast of The Last Hurrah, some of us have underlying health conditions. This week, we put our symptoms to the test and figure out what exactly is wrong with us.


The fun starts this Sunday at 7pm!

Reply All

Have you ever used the “Reply: All” function with your email provider? Perhaps, someone had a question, and instead of asking one person, they sent the question to multiple people in order to get a response quicker, and YOU happened to be one of those people. Now, if you know the answer, it would be quick and easy to email the person back, or you could instant message them if available, or you could even call them on the phone depending on the urgency of the request and the complexity of the question. But, if you did one of those things, the other recipients of the original email might think the question was never answered, and therefore might try to answer it again. So, you decide to hit “Reply: All” in order to make sure everyone else knows that question has been answered, and they would only need to respond if they had something to add or correct to your excellent answer.

The previous has been an example of how to properly use “Reply: All”

The following occurred at my office on November 16th, 2015, and is an example of exactly what “Reply: All” should not be used for.

Continue reading Reply All

Trina Rind Explains The Black Friday Incident

I never would’ve thought, I’d end up in the police station on Black Friday. Not even if someone gave me a million dollars to believe it. The first person I called was my dear friend Denise to tell her that’s where I was- and I had to tell her, you know, so she’d get true story, not whatever rumors were floating around. It was the most ridiculous little thing! Some people said I bit a child, but they don’t know the whole story. Anyway, when I called Denise up to explain that I was calling from the police station and might miss her Heifer fund charity party-guess what’s the first thing she says? She says, “Oh my god. Were you involved in the rice cooker riot at the Paradise Loft?” That’s the first thing that comes to her mind! And I thought she knew me!

Anyone who knows me knows I know that the Loft’s rice cookers are nothing to fight over. That place is good for free trade bath care products and nothing else. And I thought, how could Denise think I’m that kind of person? For over five Black Fridays, I’ve hit the stores online. Right after midnight. I’m done at 3 or 4 in the morning. Same sales. Smaller carbon footprint. That’s what I say. I wasn’t out shopping. I even have the groceries delivered. I was just out walking for exercise. In a park, no less.

It was around noon and I was still fairly tired from shopping online until 4 am. I was exhausted in fact and quite hungry. So I decided to reward myself with a little treat, and bought a hot pretzel from the stand in the park. I found the nearest bench. I was really very hungry. Starving! Then! In a matter of seconds! This family with a dozen skinny children piles onto my bench! I’m about to take my first mouthful when this little girl tries to grab the pretzel right out of my hands! Now, her unstable mother later claimed that the little girl wanted to take a closer look at my ring! Ha! The mother claims that I bit the girl’s hand then clutched my pretzel to my chest! Ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. I wouldn’t have clutched some salty thing to my new tracksuit. What really happened is this little girl was reaching for my pretzel just as I was taking a bite out of it! She practically stuck her fingers in my mouth! My luck, a policeman just happened to be patrolling this section of the park when this crazy bitch –excuse my language– when the girl’s mother was raving, practically abusing me, and there’s this little brat screaming, crying, bleeding…Ugh! Well. Bail was settled quickly enough, but the whole incident was an outrageous waste of an afternoon.

I was pretty rattled, truth be told! But the thing that really made me feel uncomfortable was what Denise said on the phone. I mean, I was at the police station, Denise was accusing me of being in a rice cooker riot and suddenly I felt like I was just a few misunderstandings away from having my whole character re-branded! So, right there, in jail, on the phone with Denise, I ended up buying like thirty Heifer fund chickens for some village. Just to feel a little more in control. Because if you don’t own your own character what do you have? Right? That was the thing that really struck me. Thankfully, even with the economy and all, I still have some financial integrity. There were murmurs, of course. There was that 5 minute news spot. The Givers Gold Circle nearly shunned me…However, as they say! “Anything irreplaceable is not worth having anyway.” I made a good showing at all the usual fundraisers and events. My holiday parties were their usual triumph. All the silly little rumors died down pretty quickly, I can tell you that. We’ve all recovered very well.

Trina Rind

The Last Hurrah’s Thanksgiving Blanket Telethon

As a part of The Last Hurrah’s Thanksgiving Special we collected blankets for the Frederick Community Action Agency. Here’s the first bit from our collection featuring Callan Holderbaum and Matt Kline.

Learn more at

This week on The Last Hurrah (11/24)

Kick off your week right with our newest episode!

61 – Thanksgrimby With Mumps the Dying Turkey

This week on The Last Hurrah, Mumps the Dying Turkey returns to the show for our Thanksgiving Extravaganza! Pilgrims collect blankets for the needy (Frederick Community Action Agency), Lydia Hadfield stops by with the tale of Thanksgrimby. So happy Thanksgrimby to all and enjoy our newest episode!

Karli Cole
Lydia Hadfield
Callan Holderbaum
Matt Kline

Subscribe and review the show on iTunes or stream it on


Then, swing by the Maryland Ensemble Theatre for…

Open Mic Night (Nov 29)

Our fourth monthly Comedy Open Mic kicks off this Sunday Nov 29th! Bring your jokes and as always, comics who don’t wish to have their sets on the podcast need only ask and they shant appear.


The fun starts this Sunday at 7pm!

Frederick Man Saved from Death by Magical Fruit

Disaster was averted this afternoon by a quick thinking teen out running with his father.

Joey Lollar, 14, and his father, Alex Lollar, 43, were out jogging through the neighborhood at 5am.

“I’ve always been a runner,” explains Alex, sitting on the back of an ambulance. “It just energizes me for the rest of the day. Every morning at 4:30, my alarm goes off, and I get out there. I smell the fresh air and watch the sunrise. I used to jog with my father every morning as a kid.”

“I like it, too,” replies Joey, not making eye contact with his dad. “It’s a good bonding experience, you know? Plus, he said if I get up every day each week, he’ll buy me McDonald’s on Friday when we finish. Oh, and if I make the track team, I can have a trampoline!”

But this fateful morning, there would be no McDonalds, and certainly no trampoline.

“We were about four miles in, coming up this long, steep hill, right before Quinn Road,” explains Alex, pointing in the air to try and demonstrate the location he was talking about but not succeeding.

“Now, I like to switch up my running routes, but I’d been this way hundreds, if not thousands, of times, and never had a problem. Nothing felt different, I was feeling strong, and I was happy to know my son was out with me, even if he couldn’t really keep up and I was off my pace.”

Suddenly, Alex said he ran into, what can only be described as, a figuratively literal brick wall.

“It was like Thor punched me in the chest,” said Alex.

“Dad, Hulk can punch so much harder than Thor.”

“Shut the fuck up when I’m talking to the reporter. Anyway, all of sudden I needed to stop, it was getting difficult to breathe. It felt like something was squeezing my chest. Then, my left arm started to tingle. I was scared.”

Luckily, little Joey wasn’t far behind.

“For most of the run, I had my head down, trying to stay out of the wind,” Joey said, still sweating profusely, hours after having stopped running.

“I looked up, and it was like my dad ran into a brick wall, literally. Wait, I think I mean figuratively. Anyway, I tried to sprint the rest of the distance between us.”

“And you still took forty-three seconds,” added Alex.

“By the time I got to him, he was laying down on the sidewalk, gasping for air. The veins on his neck and forehead were bulging out. I asked him what was wrong.”

Alex Lollar was having a heart attack.

“I knew immediately what was going on, but I have never been in this sort of situation before,” said Alex, flexing his biceps. “I’ve been in shape all my life, and we eat healthy, so why would I be having a heart attack at 43? I have heard that taking aspirin as soon as the symptoms start can help, but of course I didn’t think to have any when we left the house.”

Joey Lollar acted quickly, and used his elementary-rhyme knowledge to find a solution.

“It’s a common fact that everyone should know – beans are good for the heart. I only remembered because I would sing the nursery rhyme all the time when I was younger. ‘Beans, beans, they’re good for the heart/ The more you eat, the more you fart/ The more you fart, the better you’ll feel/ so eat baked beans for every meal.’ I knew how to save my father.”

Joey ran – well, more likely, jogged slowly – back to his house, and headed to the kitchen pantry. He was stopped by his mother, Paula Lollar, [age undisclosed].

“My son burst through the door, and my first thought was ‘there is no way he beat my husband back to the house’ so I knew something was very, very wrong. He asked me for baked beans, so I didn’t even think; I just grabbed one of the many cans of Bush’s Country Style Baked Beans we keep on hand, and got into the car with my son.”

Joey and Paula rushed to Alex’s side, but the sight was not comforting.

“He could barely get any air in his lungs,” said Paula. “Joey had never run so hard in his life. And Alex was looking even worse!”

“I just started pouring in the beans,” said Alex, his clothing soaked completely through. “I knew it was the only thing that could save him.”

The moment those beans touched his lips, Alex began to feel revitalized.

“I was still mid-heart attack, but I wanted to run a full marathon! The beans really took over, and I was certain I’d be ok.”

After drinking the entire can, Alex sat up, tousled Joey’s hair, and told him the last one home would be a rotten egg. He then took off running.

“I would’ve followed him, I really would’ve!” Cried Joey, clearly about to recite a planned excuse. “But you know the other half of the rhyme: The more you eat, the more you fart. I did not want to be anywhere behind him.”

“Yeah, the farts actually reduced my overall split rate!” said Alex, with a twinkle in his eye. “I might have to incorporate it into my morning ritual!”

At publishing, Alex had made a full recovery, and Joey has given up running forever.

T.M. Scholtes


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