O’Malley Plans to “wow” at #DemDebate with Homemade Podium

Presidential hopeful and self-starter Martin O’Malley has taken a thrifty approach to his campaign in hopes to win over the youthful hipster vote. Prior to disappearing from the campaign trail all together, O’Malley decided to save money in an attempt to connect with millennials by printing out campaign banners on 8.5×11 copy paper.IMG_1576

“I think my new approach to campaigning will really hook that key crafty-mom demo.” O’Malley said in a statement to the press. Staffers have noted that to date O’Malley has recycled four amazon boxes and used nearly 28 glue sticks to construct his podium.

According to Campaign Manager David Hamerick “The thing is loaded with glitter, once stage lights hit it it will be the only thing visible on stage.” This will no doubt aide O’Malley in the debate as he has largely been overshadowed by candidates willing to engage in policy, rhetoric and voters.

“We know that many college-aged voters are looking for candidates who can relate to them, so we ironically purchased O’Malley’s debate suit at Good Will.” Hamerick added. “At this point, we’re about appealing to anybody who will listen or give the candidate airtime.”

CNN plans to provide podiums for all candidates at the Debate but O’Malley is really hoping this solo-podium earn him the label of “maverick.”

Kevin Cole

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