We here at The Annual noticed that Dr. Benjamin Carson tends to blink a lot. He often looks like he’s been walking through the desert and can’t tell if the animal skull he’s stumbled upon is talking to him. Sometimes Carson holds his blinks for such a long time it looks like he’s taking a power nap. A normal reporter might shrug that off as a mere personality tick but we know that nothing is as it appears so we asked the question, why does Dr. Ben Carson blink so much and what does he see when he does?
The answer: a video screen! He sees a video screen! It’s like his eyelids are an iPhone and he can do everything but call a friend. Now this little trick of the eye comes in real handy for our resident doctor. Whenever he’s stressed or feeling insecure he just closes his eyes and his very own personal motivational quote pops up in his eyelids.
For example, take this moment:
What Ben saw when he blinked:
You’ve got this Carson. You are neurosurgery. You are the presidency. You are God.
Isn’t that awesome? Why wouldn’t you say Obamacare is worse than slavery if you had that type of encouragement?
There was also this moment:
What he saw:
Don’t let anyone fool you. Homosexuals chose to be gay just like you chose to be a brilliant neurosurgeon. Bring up that point about criminals turning gay in jail again.
See! The screen even helps him stick to his talking points when the liberal gotcha media tries to test him.
And then there was this moment:
What he saw:
You beautiful bastard, you would have gunned down Hitler before he even had a chance to say heil!
The Annual has discovered that that exact quote hangs in Carson’s kitchen under a sign that says Eat, Pray, Love.
Sometimes Ben has a few moments like this:
What Ben Carson Sees:
Show them who’s the boss! You will ride into the white house on a white horse brandishing your scalpel and freeing the nation from Obama’s tyranny!
Who’s the boss? Move over Tony Danza, Ben Carson’s the boss.
So next time you see Ben Carson shut his eyes like he’s taking a minute to remember his lines, know that that’s pretty much exactly what he is doing.