Checkin’ in with Interviewees May 2014

Believe it or not, those interviewed by The Annual continue to live their lives and produce new content after being interviewed. Here’s a chance to catch up on some of their current projects/whereabouts.

Tom Cotter:

Tom is set to headline the Lucille Ball Comedy Festival on August 8th in Jamestown, NY. In the next month you’ll be able to see him live in Connecticut, Florida and New Jersey. Click here for his current tour schedule.

Gaby Dunn:

Gaby now blogs for What’s Trending Live while making occasional appearances on the show. She has also launched a new webseries with her best friend entitled Just Between Us, you can hear her Five Minute Not-Cast on Soundcloud and you can read one of her latest pieces in The Jewish Daughter Diaries which will be released on May 6th.

Ron Funches:

Ron plays Shelly on NBC’s Undateable premiering May 29th at 9pm, you can watch the trailer above. In the coming weeks you can find him in Portland, Denver, and San Diego. Click here for his current tour schedule.

TJ Kincaid:

TJ continues to produce around 4-5 new Amazing Atheist videos a week he also runs a new show called The Drunken Peasants.

Colin Mochrie:

Whose Line back on TV, Colin and Brad Sherwood continue to tour together, but did you know that Colin recently released book combining classic literature with improv, it’s called Not Quite The Classics.

Greg Proops:

Greg has digitally released a new hour long special Greg Proops Live a Musso and Frank for $4.99 at gregproops.com. He also continues to tour and release The Smartest Man in the World Proopcast. You can see him live at The Bellhouse in Brooklyn, NY this weekend and across Europe throughout the rest of May.

Nick Pupo:

Hitting it’s one year anniversary a little over a month ago, Nick’s podcast Stand Up Close and Personal has been chronicling the lives of three open mic comics.

Justin Roiland:

Rick and Morty has been picked up for a second season and while the return does not yet have a premiere date, you can catch reruns on Adult Swim and hear Justin voicing Lemongrab and various other characters on Adventure Time

John Safran:

While appearing regularly on Austrailian television, John Safran’s recent projects include a true crime novel entitled Murder In Mississippi chronicling the murder of a white supremacist that John spent an uneasy couple of days with while filming his Race Relations special.

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Let There Be Lando!

It wasn’t until they released the cast list of much anticipated Star Wars Episode VII that I realized how much I loved Lando Calrissian. Billie Dee Williams brought a level of cool to the trilogy that made Han Solo look like a Jive Tauntaun. The coolest thing about Lando was that he managed to remain a rebel while commanding an entire city, because Cloud City was just small enough not to fall under the jurisdiction of the empire. Sure, he double crossed Han, but then he turned around and double crossed the empire, because no one owns Lando.

Now, I’m not too concerned about Lando being left out of Episode VII, after all, he wasn’t in Episode IV. If enough people clamor for it, he’s sure to turn up in Episode VIII, that’s the beauty of social media combined with the white house petition page.

If anything, the real problem stems from Episode III. Why was Lando left out of the prequel trilogy? Luke and Leia made an appearance. In the original trilogy, both Lando and Han refer to Luke as “kid” denoting that they’re both older and cooler than Luke. But they’re older that would mean they existed within the Star Wars universe before Luke. If Episode I featured a naked baby C-3PO, couldn’t Episode III feature Baby Lando?

I think the outrage is long overdue. It’s time we take to social media, and tweet #LetThereBeLando until George Lucas digitally inserts Baby Lando taking apart General Grievous’ body and using it to begin construction on the Millennium Falcon. Then and only then will the prequel trilogy be complete.

Kevin Cole

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Ep. 24 – Combating Relationship Burnout

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Episode 24 of Marry Me! is now live! Click the picture above to subscribe on itunes.

You can also stream the episode here.

This week Cullen, Kevin and Susan offer some real talk as they address the concept of relationship burnout. Turns out it’s a complicated topic with several causes and appropriately enough, several solutions. The conversation is based on Randi Gunther’s piece on Relationship Disenchantment. Also discussed: the surprising amount of thought that goes into wedding reception seating.

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The Annual #9 Now Available for PREORDER!

Annual9CoverComing May 8th: The Annual #9! It’s a date that has many asking, “Why not release The Annual #9 on May 9?” The answer: We want you to be happy as soon as possible, and there’s a lot to be happy about our newest issue:

Nico’s Drink of the Month comes unhinged as birthday festivities ensue. Q2Q Comics creator Steve Younkins teams with Amber George for their newest comic strip, Doomsday Sandwich. We unveil our very first topical characters: Borisnakov and Natalia. And David Luna chats with Whose Line Is It Anyway star Brad Sherwood. We’ve got food pyramids, a break-up letter to your bangs, ways to impress your date and so much more!

Head over to The Annual store and PREORDER The Annual #9 for only $4 (and free shipping)!

It’s guaranteed to be the ONLY magazine where you’ll find

a picture of Brad Sherwood

riding in his rocket chariot

being pulled by his Rottweilers

in hellhound form

in space.

Contributing Writers/Artists:

Parker Benbow | Kevin Cole | Nicolas Contreras | Lily Fryburg | Amber George | Stuart Gunter | Hannah Gutman | Briana Haynie | David Luna | Andrew Michaels | Damon Norko | Emily Perper | Buddy Purucker | Kate Sidley | Cassie Schaeffer | Kelsey Sartory | Steve Younkins

You Might Not Want to Go to Your Reunion

Last weekend, my college hosted a reunion weekend. I acted as a tour guide for all of the alumni and alumnae who came back to school for a weekend of activities. In case you were wondering about the difference between alumnae and alumni, I found it on the internet: alumni is the plural of alumnus (a male graduate); alumnae is the plural of alumna (a female graduate).

As I met a bunch of alumnae (because I go to a historically all-female school that eventually went co-ed), I couldn’t help but think that some seemed so much happier than others. Much more accomplished. As if their lives blossomed like flowers after graduation, while others just withered away.

Because I am a self-proclaimed film buff, I was reminded of a scene from “Annie Hall” in which Woody Allen’s sixth-grade classmates stand up and reveal their futures.

“I used to be a heroin addict; now I’m a methadone addict,” one student says.

While the fate of the women I met did not seem that severe, some clearly had accomplished more in their tenure out of college. Some became managers or high-ranking officials. Others balanced work with social endeavors to become well-rounded community activists. Others had started families and campaigned the importance of college to their children as they paraded through their old dorm buildings and classrooms. Others have cats.

I actually did meet a few alumnae who told me about their cats. While I love cats and thought this was a cute gesture, it made me think, “Where will I be in 20 years?”

Will I have a cat? Or will I actually have accomplished something worthwhile? Accomplished any lifelong dreams or desires? Finally appeared on television?

For that matter, where will my friends and peers be? Will I feel the compulsive need to compete and one-up my former classmates at reunions like I saw these women do?

“I have two boys in college.”

“Oh,” a snide voice responded, “Well, I have three in college. They all go to Columbia. You know. The Ivy League school.”

Yes, I had forgotten that Columbia was an Ivy League school. Thanks for the reminder!

I could never be this competitive.

Or could I? I already troll social media, seeing friends from high school post pictures and statuses that I do feel obligated to “like.” Then, I plan something much wittier or fun-sounding to post within the next hour.

So maybe we humans are, by nature, meant to compete. Is it in our blood, our DNA, our genes? For whatever reason, the reunion was as joyful as it was cutthroat. Or maybe it was joyful because it was cutthroat? I leave you with this Jarod Kintz quote:

“What does it mean to be the best? It means you have to be better than the number two guy. But what gratification is there in that? He’s a loser—that’s why he’s number two.”

Stacey Axler

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LOLing with Longreads 4/25/14

Emily Perper

“Terms and Conditions for Watching Your Stuff.” (Eliza Berman, The Rumpus)

“Hey, would you mind watching my stuff while I run to ___________ real quick?”
“Yes. Here’s my contract.” As Berman says, “Sign here, bitch.” 

“How Amy Schumer Gets Guys to Think Feminists are Funny.” (Eliana Dockterman, Time)

Like, part of me doesn’t care if men think women are funny? Because, like, screw those guys? And not literally? But this is a good analysis of Schumer’s comedic process and made me want to watch her show. In addition, I agree with the author: “the female [insert male-centric show here]” is SUCH a lazy way to describe anything. Especially awesome comedy.

“The Beards Are a Joke.” (Justin Heckert, Atlanta Magazine)

I started to read this piece, saw it was 10 pages, and almost went to bed instead. I’m glad I didn’t. The story’s premise–four bearded dudes from Atlanta climbing into an SUV and touring the country and doing standup all over the West Coast–is deceptively simple. This piece is immensely readable. I couldn’t stop. It’s a delight.

Solutions to the Oscar Mayer Wiener Recall

Kraft Food recalled 96,000 pounds of mislabeled wieners, cheese dogs were listed as classic dogs and for a brief period of time, chaos reigned. This left Kraft Foods with a surplus of 96,000 pounds of unused wieners. Luckily a team of Annual writers have put their heads together to find some practical uses for the seemingly unusable weenies.

  • Filler for Madame Tussaud wax figures
  • Edible pens
  • Game pieces the world’s most questionable Jenga tournament
  • A sculpture of Oscar Mayer’s famous wiener
  • Lincoln logs
  • An eco-friendly alternative to those colorful plastic spheres that poison the ball pits of our children’s play areas
  • Swimmies
  • Apathetic darts
  • The worst Haunnukah ever, it’d be a different story were there to be a massive recall of Hebrew National dogs.
  • The best version of A Nightmare on Elm Street
  • Pull one hell of a prank on PETA. Open the office closet? Avalanche of dogs. Time for lunch? Break room fridge-turned sausage fest.
  • Literal sausage fest
  • Unstable high heels
  • Anti vegetarian gauges
  • The claws for toy crane machines
  • The literal Hunger Games aka World’s Greatest Hot Dog Eating Contest Ever
  • A hellish game of chance for lactose intolerant prisoners
  • Rations for WWIII

Whether you work at Kraft or you’re wondering what to do with your recalled prepackaged meat, we sincerely hope this list will help you through these dark times.

Practical wiener uses by Parker Benbow, Lily Fryburg, Hannah Gutman, Briana Haynie, Andrew Michaels, Emily Perper, and Scott Travers

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