Tag Archives: College Students

A Simple Question, A Not So Simple Answer

For college students, a summer job can be both a blessing and a curse.  While providing sufficient income for the upcoming semester and increasing your entertainment “fundage,” a job can be a drag when it conflicts with pool time and vacation schedules.
This summer, I decided to find a new and different job—just to spice things up in the workplace.  After cranking out 12 or so applications, I was called for an interview at a local grocery store.  Now, for the past two months, I’ve worked at the store as a cashier.  Even though the job is simple, the grocers I’ve interacted with are certainly… odd.  Since we’re asked to greet the customers with a simple, “How are you?” I’ve gotten some unusual responses and, sometimes, some questionable questions.

Here’s what I’m talking about:

Too overjoyed: “Today is a glorious day filled with absolute glory!”

Too grumpy: “I have two teenager daughters, a bitchy wife and a kidney stone coming.  What do you think?”

Too personal:  “I’m pretty good.  Just realized the scab on my back looks like Calvin and Hobbes duking it out.”

Too sexual (customer was purchasing erectile dysfunction medication):  “Pecker ain’t what it used to be, but I’ve got a feeling he will bounce back.”

Too WTF?: “My kid’s hamster died, so pretty damn swell.”

Questions I’ve received:

“Anyone ever tell you that you look like Chris Farley?”

“Do you have a trashcan for this diaper?”

“What is the circumference of your melons?”

“Can I get a discount on these condoms that I found it the bathroom?”

“I sneezed on this fruit, so can I get a discount?”

“Why are you telling me this?” you ask. Perhaps I’m telling you to apply to your nearest grocery store.  Maybe I want you to think about what goes on in a grocery store bathroom.  Or you should question where your recent fruit purchases have really been.  Despite the nature of these “average” customers and my overall experience, I will say it sure as hell beats a desk job.

Andrew Michaels

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