Tag Archives: Twitter

Things To Do With The Extra Hours Of Winter Darkness

Finally watch Stranger Things.

Gain Twitter followers from live tweeting Stranger Things.

Create a butt divot in your couch.

Lock yourself inside your home.

Call your mom so that she can reassure you winter won’t last forever.

Use your tears to get your daily 8 glasses of water.

Slowly unravel the sweater your aunt knitted for you as you chant “I can’t handle this” at the wall.

Contemplate death by firing squad because it’s quicker than death by winter’s wind.

Lose some Twitter followers because you’re tweeting too much about firing squads.

Thank the NRA for following you on Twitter.

Pull out your hair to crochet into a blanket.

Impress your aunt with your new blanket.

Type up a manifesto while eating a block of Velveeta cheese.

Crumple up your manifesto and start over because you typed, “Blood. Blood. Blood.” Instead of, “I’ve never gone to a Taylor Swift concert.”

Snuggle up to your laptop and wave to the Demogorgon as you pray for spring.

Briana Haynie

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We Aggregated Content from Other @FATJEW Interviews to Post our own Exclusive Interview

Making the final stop on his Aggregation-Nation Tour, we had the chance to speak to internet phenomenon Josh Ostrovsky better known as The Fat Jewish (@FATJEW for short). We met in a spa, he was half-naked both physically and emotionally, totally smart, totally gets it, just a guy who likes to have fun.

The Annual: Mr. Fat Jew, how are you?

Fat Jew: I’ve been doing moronic stuff

TA: How so?

FJ: I auditioned for the Jerky Boys movie. I’ve been ordering ridiculous things from the bodega guy for years.

TA: Before we go any further, there have been some serious allegations made against you lately with regard to the Lindbergh baby-

FJ: I like to think I’m a trusted voice of pop culture.

TA: Sure, but these are serious allegations pertaining to a legitimate crime.

FJ: No, [it wasn’t].

TA: You don’t think that the kidnapping and eventual murder of a child counts as a crime?

FJ: No, I don’t, honestly. I think of myself as a commentator, as an entertainer. I mean, my dad doesn’t exactly know what I do. He tells his friends I’m an adult entertainer, which is probably not the best thing to tell them. It’s all so new. For me, it’s about commentary. It’s about shining light on things that are chill and taking a piss on things that are ridiculous. I’m sort of a Renaissance man of pop culture. There are elements of comedy, but that is not the genesis of what I am. I’m a satirist. I’m a commentator. I’m a performance artist.

TA: So let me see if I understand this correctly, on the evening of March 1, 1932, you kidnapped the child of aviator Charles Lindbergh and Anne Morrow Lindbergh from their family home, as a act of kaufman-esque performance art? You kidnapped a child for the sake of… what’s the term? Comedy.

Fat Jew

FJ: No, that had nothing to do with comedy. Again, I’m a performance artist. I love conversation. That’s why this entire situation is okay with me in some ways — because I like discourse.

TA: Okay then…

FJ: It was 2009. I don’t think anyone understood the power of social media.

TA: I don’t think the year matters. It’s absolutely sick, you documented the entire thing on instagram.

FJ: Absolutely. It’s important to note that Instagram — social media in general — is just a part of what I do. It’s not the focus. I’ve got White Girl Rosé, I’ve got a book coming out, I’ve got plus-size modeling, I’ve got all kinds of different stuff happening.

Kevin Cole
(with a little help from Vulture and The Today Show)